Q3 Results: COMO Wins Trophy!

Story by Muckety Muck – Photos by Bob Dunnell

(BALLWIN, MO) The primary travel squad for COMO Roller Derby made the most out their mileage at the inaugural Queeny Quad Quake tournament held December 14 at Queeny Park’s Midwest Sport Hockey.

The Columbia, Missouri travelers’ 100-mile trek was certainly worth it as the squad claimed the event’s trophy in the four-team event hosted by Arch Rival Roller Derby.

COMO’s All-Stars topped the ARCH Fleur Delinquents in the semifinal round, 116-55, and then posted an 85-61 triumph over Confluence Crush Roller Derby’s Smitten Kittens to win the inaugural event that featured 30-minute games.

The Kittens, CCRD’s b-team, topped the St. Chux Derby Chix Pack in Black to reach Saturday’s finale. ARCH ‘s C-team finished the event 1-1 after winning the third place game over SCDC.


Nine newcomers were featured in the Fleur De Linquents’ 15-skater roster but it was the depth of experience from COMO that figured the final output.

Leading 15-9 after five jams, COMO extended their lead to 31-9 with Lilo & Stitches’ 16-point jam recorded at the 22:30 mark. The margin widened as the contest progressed thanks to a pair of eight-pointers scored by Payne Gretzky that pushed COMO’s lead to 64-24 with 12:30 left.

Arch Rival rebounded with an 11-point power jam from Zoe Hell that sliced the lead to 64-35.

COMO continued the pressure and surged ahead with another eight scored by Gretzky with under eight minutes left. Stitches added an late nine-pointer with under five minutes left that secured the 61-point semifinal duke.


Defense was on display in the other semifinal as Confluence Crush, who hosts their travel team games at Belleville, Illinois’ Belle-Clair Fairgrounds, held the St. Charles rep scoreless through the first five jams. With a jammer rotation of Jackie Stabit, Roksolid and Skirt Cobain effectively posting points, the Kittens clawed their way to a 32-0 lead six minutes in.

SCDC jammers Trekkie Monster and Alexis, Play Derby broke the goose egg as the period progressed but the Kittens posted a 33-0 run over four jams midway that highlighted the semifinal. Propelled by Stabit’s 11-point strike at the 14:45 mark, CCRD blossomed the lead to 79-12.

SCDC was able to pick up the scoring deep and doubled their point production in the final ten minutes. The Kittens notched a dozen on the game’s final rotation to claim the 78-point victory that advanced them to the finale.


Both teams craved a win to finish out the evening and the Pack in Black opened eyes early. With Tara Eyes’ 14-8 strike in the game’s second jam, SCDC possessed a 15-8 lead.

Arch Rival countered with a 27-0 run over the next three jams. Following Indiana Bones’ grand slam in jam three, rookie Scooty Boots claimed a 15-point strike at 23:10 that resulted in a 27-15 lead change. Hell finished the rally with an eight-pointer at 21:30 that made the score 35-15.

As the period progressed, Arch Rival continued to push agead. Hell’s 24-point jam recorded at 15:05 widened the FDL’s advantage to 79-24.

To their credit, SCDC did not surrender and continued to post scoring passes to the point of eclipsing their earlier semifinal output and notched a respectable 33 additional points in the back half against a stingy ARCH defense.

ARCH finished the event 1-1 and is scheduled to resume full-length play in April 2020. Meanwhile, SCDC will use the experience as they prepare for their competitive season that begins at home on March 7, 2020.


As much as both squads displayed their offensive firepower in the semifinals, the Q3 trophy game was centered on each respective squads’ defense, or at least which one made the fewest mistakes. This resulted in plenty of topsy-turvy moments.

An opening 15-8 rotation from Stabit, who was not lead jammer, gave the Crush the early edge. Then after COMO posted a pair of points in Jam 2, the Kittens rolled out 15 uncontested. With an eight-pointer from Abitude followed by seven from Cobain, CCRD amassed a 30-10 advantage nine minutes into the half-hour finale.

COMO rebounded with a 27-0 run over four jams. Stitches’ 20-point power jam at the 17:25 mark resulted in a 34-30 lead change. An additional trey from Weird Al Shank-a-Bitch widened the score to 37-30.

COMO extended the lead to 47-34 following Stitches’ four-pointer with 13:10 but the Kittens narrowed the deficit to single digits with Abitude’s eight point strike that whittled the lead to 47-42 with under twelve minutes left.

COMO’s defense then went into lockdown mode with a 26-7 output over the next seven jams. Launched by Gretzky’s eight-point rotation in Jam 13, COMO widened the score to 73-49 heading into the game’s final rotations.

A 12-8 rotation by the Crush’s Abitude on the penultimate jam gave her squad a glimmer of hope as the score read 81-61 but on the final jam COMO obtained lead jammer status and drained the clock in order to claim the Q3 title.

Arch Rival beings their 2020 local season that features four local squads on Saturday, January 11 at Midwest Sport Hockey. In the evening’s launcher, defending League champions, the Smashnistas, meets last year’s runner-up, Rebel Skate Alliance.  Then a battle between the Stunt Devils and M-80s follows.

Discounted tickets for the event are available by clicking on this sentence.

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Muckety Muck

Muckety Muck has been a co-announcer for Arch Rival Roller Derby since 2008. Writes Arch Rival previews and recaps for Arch City Sports, a St. Louis-based sports website.

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