RSA & Smashies Stay Undefeated In Local Play

(BALLWIN, MO) A pair of local squads within the four-team complexion of Arch Rival Roller Derby recorded victories Saturday to remain undefeated, although the final differential in each respective game was decidedly different.

In the twin bill held in front of 600 fans, Rebel Skate Alliance topped the Stunt Devils, 253-140, in the opener while the Smashinistas edged the M-80s, 204-191, in the night cap.

Both RSA and the Smashies improved to 2-0 with the victories and the pair will meet head-to-head at ARCH’s next event on Saturday, January 26 at the Queeny Park complex. Also that night, the M-80s and the Stunt Devils, both 0-2, will tangle to see who grabs their first victory within ARCH six-event regular season.

Advance tickets for the event are available at this link by clicking on this sentence. Save $3 on individual tickets and groups of six and more get in for $9 each.


It did not take long for RSA, who made their return last month to ARCH after a four-season absence, to quickly establish themselves as an early favorite for potential trophy  placement at the League’s finale in late-April.

Their play was out of this world and the triple-digit outcome over the defending champs was earmarked  by an extremely dominant first period.

Jammer Darth Tator’s 17-point opening rotation set the tone for the game but to their credit, the Stunts countered with a 16-8 run over the next four jams that was concluded with Scarrie Fisher’s pair of points scored eight minutes deep that shored the RSA’s lead to a baker’s dozen, 29-16.

The intergalactic schematic of RSA blocking, paced by Endorable!, Titanium Falcon, SITH HAPPENS!, Lethal Dose, Wookie Monster, Zombie Plagueis, Spock N’ Roll, Jabba the Butt, Han Rolo, Storm Bruiser and C3P Oh-No! steered the ship to the tune of a 29-7 stretch that concluded with Darth Tator’s dozen point jam scored at the 17:00 mark that pushed the lead to 58-23.

That momentum continued as the period progressed. RSA eclipsed triple-digits with Admiral Aggbar’s 15-point power jam scored with 4:15 left that made the score 108-54.

Boba Flash’s 20-point exclamation point in the period’s final jam resulted in RSA’s 137-61 lead at intermission.

Despite the huge halftime hole, the Stunts kept better pace in the second period. With blocking by Reese Wither(n’ Die) Spoon,  Zooma Thurman, Kill-ya Knightly, Rhonda Lousey, Ginger Assassin, Sir Ian McKillin’, Fast ‘n’ Lucy Liu, Nunchucks Norris and Glenn Close But No Cigar, the defending champs helped jammers Zoe Hell and Slamgelina Jolie claim much needed points.

RSA pushed the differential past 100 points after Flash’s 11-spot claimed midway through the period pushed the score to 191-89.

Down the stretch a pair of solid rotations from SITH HAPPENS! resulted in jams of 24 and 14 points, respectively, widened RSA’s lead to 243-134 with 2:20 left.

RSA outscored the Stunts in the second half 116-79 in the second en route to the 253-140 victory. Darth Tator topped all scorers with 86 points.


RSA: Darth Tator 86, Boba Flash 66, Admiral Aggbar 48, SITH HAPPENS! 37, Han Rolo 15.

STUNT DEVILS: Scarrie Fisher 47, Zoe Hell 46, Slamgelina Jolie 31, Rhonda Lousey 16.

SMASHINISTAS 204  M-80s 191

As wide as the differential was in the opener, the final of the second game wasn’t determined until the final seconds expired. The Smashies’ 11-4 scoreboard flipping jam recorded deep resulted in an exhausting win that kept the team’s record unblemished.

Trailing 12-4 five minutes in, Smashies’ jammer Frowntown notched a 24-point power jam that resulted in a 28-12 lead change at the 23:45 mark.

And although that looked shaky early for the M-80s, the troopers rebounded with an eye=opening 44-0 rally over the next five jams. L’Oakey Doki’s eight-pointer in Jam 6 was followed by Owl Wing It’s 11-point flight with 20;15 remaining that resulted in a 31-28 lead change.

Doki tacked on another 11-point rotation that pushed the score to 42-28. Pivot Special Brownies then converted to jammer during Jam 9 and collected nine points. Doki’s 16-point power jam with 15:10 left put the exclamation point on the stretch run as the M-80s pushed their lead to 66-28.

But with a snap of the fingers, the Smashies erased the huge advantage with back-to-back double-digit jams. Smashing Violet’s 20-point thump with 13:15 left in the frame was followed by Olive Smashin’s 10-point punch narrowed the score to 66-58 at the 12:00 mark.

The M-80s felt the heat but quickly extinguished the blaze with a 40-10 rally over the next six minutes. With blocking propelled by Merit Badger, Trampfire, Special Brownies, Scouts Horror, Slipknot, Curl Scout, Crumbledore, Slam Shakusky, S’More Cowbell and Wood Bang, the red-flannels pushed their lead to 106-68 following Doki’s 18-point power jam with 5:20 left.

The Smashies dodged a bullet and capitalized on a pair of power jams deep that resulted in a 39-8 finishing run. Frowntown ended the period by pacing a 20-point power jam that narrowed the score to a nail-biting 114-107 M-80s lead at intermission.

That would not be the final moment of heart palpitations as eight lead changes were recorded in the second half.

After the M-80s picked up a pair of points early in the frame, Olive Smashin’s 20-point rotation with 24:15 remaining gave the Smashies a 127-118 scoreboard flip.

The M-80s responded with 16 points straight. Jammer Camp Kwitcherbitchin’s eight-pointer claimed with 20:50 remaining resulted in a 130-127 lead change. Doki added four on the next rotation that extended the score to 134-127.

The M-80’s mainted that seven point differential as the period progressed and clung onto a 142-135 lead with 17:30 left in the game. The Smashies the utilized expert blocking by Cloak N’ Drag-Her, Smashbird, Nigel Smashberry, chill beans, Smash Money, Gnarley Carbsmashian, Regrets, Smash Me Ousside, The Monster Smash, Regrets and Smashsquatch en route to a 22-0 run.

Smashin’s eight-point jam collected with 15:00 left resulted in a 143-142 lead change and Violet’s 14-pointer with 12:45 remaining pushed the lead to 157-142.

The Smashies kept the differential at double-digits as they possessed a 178-165 lead with six minutes left.

That was soon erased as the M-80’s Doki notched an 18-ponter with 4:15 left that resulted in the period’s seventh lead change, a 183-178 edge by the scouts.

The Smashies quickly countered with a three-spot sported by Violet that narrowed the game to two points. Then, the olive-clads claimed a scoreboard flip as Frowntown’s 15-4 rotation in the waning minutes handed the Smashies back the lead to 196-187. An additional eight from Violet on the game’s penultimate jam pushed the score to 204-187.

Insurmountable odds faced the M-80s on the game’s final jam, but they were able to obtain lead jammer status on the final rotation and were able to gain a power jam as the period clock expired. However, the Smashies’ defense put a lock down on the proceedings and only surrendered four points within the remaining minute of play.

The Smashies outscore the M-80s in the second 97-77 in the second half en route to a very-entertaining 204-191 victory.


SMASHINISTAS: Frowntown 81, Smashing Violet 61, Olive Smashin’ 42, Skeevie Nicks 20

M-80s: L’Oakey Doki 121. Special Brownies 32,Slipknot 23, Camp Kwitcherbitchin 9, Owl Wing It! 6

Share Now
Muckety Muck

Muckety Muck has been a co-announcer for Arch Rival Roller Derby since 2008. Writes Arch Rival previews and recaps for Arch City Sports, a St. Louis-based sports website.

All Posts

Related Post

Leave us a reply